Det danske Fredsakademi
Kronologi over fredssagen og international politik 30. August 2012 / Timeline August 30, 2012
Version 3.529. August 2012, 31. August 2012,
08/30/2012
Ann Romney Attempts to Humanize Husband Mitt
By Don Monkerud
While fundamentalist Christian supporters locked arms outside the
convention center this week to protect the GOP from God's wrath via
Hurricane Isaac, Ann Romney told the white delegates inside that her
husband was "the greatest lifter ever," who will levitate America
with one giant bench press.
Ann's giggly speech was part of an assault on the news media to
"humanize" Mitt, whose vision shifts like the preverbal sands of the
Sahara, and to focus on cutting taxes for billionaires while
shrinking government programs for the needy. As she recounted the
daily trials of living on $12 million a year, she noted the rising
cost of thoroughbred horses, servants' salaries, and maintenance on
the couple's many properties.
Despite rumors that the Romney's owned 16 properties over the past
decade, Ann said they are much poorer than what many believe. They
own only an $800,000 condo in Massachusetts, a $7 million complex of
two properties in New Hampshire, and a $12 million dollar "tear down"
in La Jolla, that the Romney's are expanding to 11,000 sq. ft. to
accommodate their growing Mormon family of four dozen.
When it comes to Mitt's taxes, Ann stood up for her man. "We need
more money and fewer taxes, but releasing our tax data will only make
people hate us; people know everything they ever need to know about
our money. It's none of their business."
Ann said Mitt had a "warm and loving heart" and stands with the
oppressed minority of gun owners in America who need larger magazine
clips for their automatic military rifles. "Do you realize you can't
shoot in bars, in restaurants, in schools and churches anymore? You
can't shoot anyplace. We have to return the country to the past, and
Mitt promises to do that!"
Reminiscing on the family's early privation, Ann explained how one
night when they were first married and she was pregnant, Mitt made
her climb on the roof to fix the TV antennae during a lightning
storm. "He said it would help build character, and his words of
wisdom served me well in dressage, where I've been under tremendous
pressure to win."
Life for the well-heeled family has not been a bed of roses. "Believe
me," Ann said, sipping from a 40 ounce energy drink, "it wasn't easy
to raise five boys on a million dollars a month and it's getting
harder: Can you imagine what it cost to change to oil on my six
Cadillacs?" Nor were her children spoiled, despite receiving
paychecks from the family businesses. "Their allowances were barely
more than that of our servants," she said.
While Mitt stood in the background wearing a Duchene smile, Ann
recounted how difficult it was to convert from Episcopalian to
Mormonism, which requires wearing special magic underwear. She
referred to the garment filled with secret symbols that every true
believer wears 24/7. "It's all about love," Ann emphasized, "and
about sacrifice. Our family life is centered around sacrificing for
Mitt."
Proud of Mitt's religious state, Utah, which she visited once, Ann
suggested that Bingham Canyon, "the biggest pit in the world,"
inspired her when she saw it. "Mitt and I went there to dedicate
ourselves to ourselves," Ann explained. "It makes us feel powerful,
which is what America's all about." Kennecott Copper is digging the
pit, a hole half a mile deep and 2.5 miles wide that would seat 9
million people. It sits where a mountain once stood and has become a
symbol for the conservation agenda of the GOP.
"Believe me, life is hard for everyone, us included," Ann said. She
emphasized that Mitt built Bain Capital Management and took a
hands-on role in helping people move beyond their once stable jobs to
embrace change so they could "go out into the world to find new
opportunities instead of being stuck with the same old job they had
for years."
In closing, Ann brought GOP delegates to their feet when she called
for cutting Medicare and Social Security for millions of Americans.
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